Thursday, April 22, 2010
WEIRD DREAM!!
So as you may know (or not) my gma was murdered recently. I went through a small time of depression (including sadness and anger). I went and saw my mentor and friend craig...and that helped a lot. Like i said in a previous post, i could finally see the silver lining and where God was at in all of this! But the best thing that helped me was this dream...
I had a dream where i was able to talk to my gma...it was so weird because it felt so real. But we talked. I asked her questions that i had, apologized for some guilt i had, she apologized for somethings too. Then i woke up....
I do this thing where i look up my dreams........the analysis of this dream:
To see your dead sibling, relative, or friend in your dream, indicates that you miss them and are trying to relive your old experiences you had with them. In trying to keep up with the pace of your daily waking life, you dreams may serve as your only outlet in coping and coming to terms with the loss of a loved one.
And thats what it did...it help me come to terms and answer questions. Pretty nifty!
So how do i relate this to God. God is big enough to do anything. There is a verse that says "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17
I am one to think that God knows our needs...most people would agree with that statement. And so im pretty sure God knew that this evil thing that happened was killing me and affecting our relationship. So i feel God gave this to me because in my situation...this is what was good and perfect...it is what i needed most!
So you may have had a random situation happen....but look for God in the little things....because God is always working to turn your ugly mess into a hot mess (hot mess=awesome thing).
UNTIL NEXT TIME...
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Lamentations 3:19-24
Lamentations 3:19-24
(Contemporary English Version)
19Just thinking of my troubles
and my lonely wandering
makes me miserable.
20That's all I ever think about,
and I am depressed.
21But there's one other thing I remember,
and remembering, I keep a grip on hope:
22The LORD's loyal love never fails!
If he had not been merciful,
we would have been destroyed.
23The LORD can always be trusted
to show mercy each morning.
24Deep in my heart I say,
"The LORD is all I need;
I can depend on him!"
Are you feeling like this? Have you felt like this?? We never read from Lamentations because it is so depressing, but this little section is the only glimmer of hope that these people have...and in the deepest darkness of our lives, its the only glimmer of hope that we have!
Until Next Time...
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Critical...but for reason!
And so I am very critical of the ministry I do with youth. I dont want it to be cheesy or routine. Last nite was our TWLOHA concert and it went great! I had two youth in charge and they did great! I have gotten into this mode where i am giving responsibility to the youth and letting them take part in building this...making them ever mindful that though it is for us, it is also to glorify and honor God. ME LIKEY!!! It has taken some weight off my shoulders...
So they had a response time...they were called to write stories about their lives, almost like cardboard testimonies! But this was wayyy better! But here was the bigger point...I wanted everyone, guests and all to feel welcome.
A person who i never met before said she felt so welcome in our group last nite...
This makes my heart smile....and the heart of God smile!!
The sense of community at its best!
The youth are doing it through God's Holy Spirit!
ROLL YOUTH ROLL!
BYAHHHH!!!
Until Next Time....
Thursday, March 25, 2010
When I look at the starsss....
So in class today, a woman preached on the stars that Abraham saw as God spoke to him and God promised Abraham children that would out number the stars. Just think about the image that Abraham saw...in the middle of a desert, in the pitch black dark of night! He looks up and he sees MILLIONS of sparkling dots in the sky, as if they are saying "I am one of your future grandkids." But then Abraham notices that as he counts, there are stars that keep appearing brand new, and others that are dying off. And so Abraham loses count, but how happy he must have been! Abraham went from a man whose wife was barren, to being promised that God would provide him a SON! And God kept his promise. But little did Abraham know that one of these grandkids would be the man who would be called "the Morning Star"...or as my friend Erik Hawks once wrote "the one star that would never fall!"
That man is Jesus. Yesterday during youth bible study, one of my youth, Caroline, asked me about the star glued to my office door. The star reads "there's one star that will never fall..." She did not understand. Jesus, being called THE LIGHT and MORNING STAR, is that star that we can always look for to guide us and light the way! He never fails, He never falls.
So may you, when you look at the stars again, think about God's promise to Abraham...and realize that God's promise continues, that He will provide for your needs...especially in Jesus Christ!
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Silver Lining

So for the first time since 7th grade i received counseling. I am not one to open up about the deep sad and angry feelings that I may have. But after visiting a church service in Clayton, i realized that I was holding in some emotions that were doing some serious eating away at my soul...like Golden Corral buffet style. How do i know this? Well briefly:
---my spiritual side was hurting...less convo with God, less reading of the Bible, we are talking almost non-existent.
---my relational side was bad...i became very short tempered, lost passion for some things that i am VERY passionate about, and started withdrawing from my peeps (the human ones, i already ate the marshmellow ones).
Emily became worried (cuz she's a woman) and urged me to go see my buddy Craig. And it was a good experience. It was something I needed. God did work, son!
Its been six weeks since my gma's murder...and I am doing okay with it, but still not quite over it. I am wayyyy better than i was. The anger has calmed, the sadness has calmed, but I have my moments...but the fact that I have come this far gives me hope that I am getting back to the old Gaddy...and thats a good thing.
The challenge here is to find the silver lining. Romans 8:28 says: we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called. according to his purpose. Is this true? Can a murder, or divorce, or car accident really be something good?
Well, yea! Heck, why not? Think about it in the long run. Because of my gma's murder, I am better able to relate with other people's tragedies, understand some reasons behind addictions, and able to help people with their grief in future situations.
So where is the silver lining in your situation? How is God trying to make a good thing out of your tragedy? And are you letting him?
Until Next Time....
Friday, March 12, 2010
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Heart Exam
Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith.2 Corinthians 13:5a
True faith in Christ is lived out by the things we do each and every day. And by our example, we can either push someone away from God, or bring them closer to knowing the life-changing truth of Jesus Christ.
Because of the eternal importance of our example, we have to regularly revisit what’s right and what’s wrong in our behavior. We have to make sure that our moral compass is dialed into the clear standards of God’s word, and not the murky gray version of right and wrong that the world has created.
As you walk through each day, take some time to take an honest look at your actions and investigate the level of influence your faith has on others. Are you doing all that God has asked of you? Are you truly in the faith?
Next Steps
- Think of some actions you have taken that made your faith visible to others.
- Ask yourself: Am I an authentic believer who shows others what it really means to know Jesus Christ? Write out why or why not.
- Ask for God’s help to honestly examine your heart as you seek for ways to increase your influence with others.
